‘Real Wooden Robot’ ...Oh Canada

Oh Canada! I’m not political, and today I had to exercise my legal right to participate in an advanced democracy. I don’t support any political parties, and I have publicly admitted to ballot spoiling. I always make a drawing on my ballot, with the secret hope that one day a ballot counter will exercise some lateral thinking and “collect” some art. This election was no different than the last one, however... After reviewing the quality of this election’s candidates, I was struck by the notion that , Democracy is alright, but we really ought to use some softer paper for the ballots. I don’t understand why the whole process is not electronic.

Now everybody say, “ Real Wooden Robot ” five times fast, it's even harder than Chinese arithmetic.‘ The Real Wooden Robot ’ is contemporary treen, old timey, made from wood, ‘cause wood is good. Constructed with the finest tree fort craftsmanship; ‘ The Real Wooden Robot ’ is a working machine, it will open your beer. Fully articulated for freestanding domestic work, suitable for the tasteful decoration of any home or office; ‘ The Real Wooden Robot ’ doesn’t make boring speeches, or recommend Crown commissions. ‘ The Real Wooden Robot ’ does what it does, It opens beer, and validates the good feelings of all people everywhere. Finally, unlike elections, with paper ballots and cardboard booths,‘ The Real Wooden Robot ’ has a very small ecological footprint, simply owning one gets you valuable carbon credits. So you can feel less guilty about driving a gas sucking pig, pouring your old turpentine down the sink, or spoiling your ballot.

I got some help building my Robot from Val. Val knows how to use a saw to cut big wood, and manages the workshop across from the Chapel. Val likes the things I make and had a good laugh when she saw the The Real Wooden Robot ’ finished.

Photo Credit: Laurie MacMillan

-Copy Cats are Dirty Rats