‘Real Wooden Robot’ ...Oh Canada

Oh Canada! I’m not political, and today I had to exercise my legal right to participate in an advanced democracy. I don’t support any political parties, and I have publicly admitted to ballot spoiling. I always make a drawing on my ballot, with the secret hope that one day a ballot counter will exercise some lateral thinking and “collect” some art. This election was no different than the last one, however... After reviewing the quality of this election’s candidates, I was struck by the notion that , Democracy is alright, but we really ought to use some softer paper for the ballots. I don’t understand why the whole process is not electronic.

Now everybody say, “ Real Wooden Robot ” five times fast, it's even harder than Chinese arithmetic.‘ The Real Wooden Robot ’ is contemporary treen, old timey, made from wood, ‘cause wood is good. Constructed with the finest tree fort craftsmanship; ‘ The Real Wooden Robot ’ is a working machine, it will open your beer. Fully articulated for freestanding domestic work, suitable for the tasteful decoration of any home or office; ‘ The Real Wooden Robot ’ doesn’t make boring speeches, or recommend Crown commissions. ‘ The Real Wooden Robot ’ does what it does, It opens beer, and validates the good feelings of all people everywhere. Finally, unlike elections, with paper ballots and cardboard booths,‘ The Real Wooden Robot ’ has a very small ecological footprint, simply owning one gets you valuable carbon credits. So you can feel less guilty about driving a gas sucking pig, pouring your old turpentine down the sink, or spoiling your ballot.

I got some help building my Robot from Val. Val knows how to use a saw to cut big wood, and manages the workshop across from the Chapel. Val likes the things I make and had a good laugh when she saw the The Real Wooden Robot ’ finished.

Photo Credit: Laurie MacMillan

-Copy Cats are Dirty Rats


Hobo Divine said...

Whoa that robot is hardcore!
I see it has some scarification on it's legs.
and now it's understood!

How does RWR feel about twist-off's?

Red Eyes said...

I also have a real wooden robot but its a veggie

Robert Chaplin rca said...

Thanks Hobo Divine,
RWR prefers twist-off's to people trying to open beer with their teeth.
Saftey first ! lets not have to make any uncalled for dental appointments.

Robert Chaplin rca said...

Thanks Red Eyes

Red Eyes said...

Hi Robert,

Just to say thanks for stopping by and staying connected.

Your wooden robot is certainly more of a serious creation than my veggie. I love the wonderful features and abilities you describe. Its an amazing creation and I would like to return again soon.

Bye for now.

R.E.II said...

Hello again,
my new blog - is finally on ...
See you there, hopefully

Lara said...


Robert Chaplin rca said...

thanks for looking Lara, If you are interested in food, next time you come to Vancouver check out Barbara-Jo's books to cooks
its a wicked store.
cheers, R