Robert Chaplin Vs Garry Kasparov

Once upon a time, not so very long ago, the world was a place where tall tales reigned supreme and great men walked upon the earth. These great men ascended by virtue of their gifts, focus, and dedication; lumberjacks, steel drivin’ men, and chess masters. Now I'm an ordinary man, I make things, and some of them turn out well. This chess set I’ve designed in Lego seems to fit that bill, and this is me getting my ass kicked by Garry Kasparov.
The really cool thing about playing Kasparov is that, you can have no expectation of victory, so there's no pressure. He started playing chess when he was a very little boy. Kasparov’s young mind wrapped itself around the secrets of the game, and this process formed the consciousness of the man sitting across the table from me. The thing about focus on a single activity at a young age, is that it creates people who can do things very well, and this experience can inform lateral thinking. Garry Kasparov has retired from professional chess and is now active in Russian politics, his understanding of situations is sublime.

I flew to Toronto to meet Kasparov and deliver his Lego chess set; this happened on Monday morning, it came about because my family loves me, and I’ve made some damn good friends. I taught Kasparov the secrets of Lego chess, how to take the set apart , put it away, and how to move the men using the piece picker. From Kasparov, I learned about the traditional board orientation, and that you can’t castle out of check. Getting a lesson, and high praise from a giant feels pretty good :) Nothing can replace the play of chess, in real time, on an actual set, with an actual human. Now you can play chess like Kasparov, anywhere, anytime.



Photo Credit 1: Taralea Cutler
Photo Credit 2: Peter Lattimer

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Globe and Mail
-Timothy Taylor
Globe and Mail
-Timothy Taylor
to: robertchaplin{at}lightspeed{dot}ca
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My suit: Modernize Tailors.
-Copy Cats are Dirty Rats

‘Real Wooden Robot’ ...Oh Canada

Oh Canada! I’m not political, and today I had to exercise my legal right to participate in an advanced democracy. I don’t support any political parties, and I have publicly admitted to ballot spoiling. I always make a drawing on my ballot, with the secret hope that one day a ballot counter will exercise some lateral thinking and “collect” some art. This election was no different than the last one, however... After reviewing the quality of this election’s candidates, I was struck by the notion that , Democracy is alright, but we really ought to use some softer paper for the ballots. I don’t understand why the whole process is not electronic.

Now everybody say, “ Real Wooden Robot ” five times fast, it's even harder than Chinese arithmetic.‘ The Real Wooden Robot ’ is contemporary treen, old timey, made from wood, ‘cause wood is good. Constructed with the finest tree fort craftsmanship; ‘ The Real Wooden Robot ’ is a working machine, it will open your beer. Fully articulated for freestanding domestic work, suitable for the tasteful decoration of any home or office; ‘ The Real Wooden Robot ’ doesn’t make boring speeches, or recommend Crown commissions. ‘ The Real Wooden Robot ’ does what it does, It opens beer, and validates the good feelings of all people everywhere. Finally, unlike elections, with paper ballots and cardboard booths,‘ The Real Wooden Robot ’ has a very small ecological footprint, simply owning one gets you valuable carbon credits. So you can feel less guilty about driving a gas sucking pig, pouring your old turpentine down the sink, or spoiling your ballot.

I got some help building my Robot from Val. Val knows how to use a saw to cut big wood, and manages the workshop across from the Chapel. Val likes the things I make and had a good laugh when she saw the The Real Wooden Robot ’ finished.

Photo Credit: Laurie MacMillan

-Copy Cats are Dirty Rats

HOT POTATO aka Old Four Eyes

The ‘Hot Potato’ has four eyes, and sees
through lies, and answers questions which arise...


What is Hematite ?
What is the Eye of Horus ?
What are the fashions in Potato Bug Country ?
What is the Hot Potato Game ?
What is the Illuminati ?
Who are the Freemasons ?
What is Mr Potato Feeling ?
Where can I find a good optometrist ?
Where can I study conspiracy theory ?
When is Now ?
Why is that freaky eye and pyramid on the backside of a greenback ?
How do I grow a potato ?
How do I build a spud gun ?

This objet d'art, in hematite, was carved by my hand using diamonds and water.
A mysterious process indeed.



photo credit: Peter Lattimer
-Copy Cats are Dirty Rats